I have been trying really hard to teach Claire the importance of being independent and getting herself ready each day. It's not that she can't do it, it's more that she won't do it. It drives me crazy. It is hard getting myself ready each day let alone three other people, so just having her do it herself helps a lot.
We don't have church until 11:00 so I let the kids hang out in their jammas for a while on Sunday morning (usually we get up and get dressed as soon as breakfast is over). So, she came in my room while I was feeding Grant and announced that she was going to get ready for church. She went in her room, and came out wearing the most interesting outfit ever. She had on a dress which was green with flowers, paired with tights that were striped and multi colored, and her church shoes. Then she went in the bathroom combed her hair (mostly forward), and brushed her teeth, at which point she came back in my room looked in my mirror and smiled the biggest smile ever, and announced that she was ready for church.
Now, I wish I had a picture because the girl looked bad. But, she was proud of herself. So, I got in the shower and tried to figure out how I was going to convince her to change her outfit. Chad came home from his meetings and asked me what was up with Claire's outfit. I explained, and with a little coaxing, he got her to change into different tights, and let me put some "pretties" in her hair.
My question is, should I have just let her be? She was so proud of herself, but she looked so bad. Maybe I'm a little vain, but I didn't need my daughter going to church looking like a clown. Did I just put a huge setback on everything I have been working for? Or, did we make the right decision?? Just curious as to what you think.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
A question for all you moms out there.
Posted by CA Clayson Fam at 8:46 PM
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4 comments:
I wouldn't worry about it. in the future just use love & logic w/her. lay out 2 outfits that you're ok with and she chooses. if she wants to barter & negotiate it's up to her. when ellie puts up a fight when I do that I say, ok mom gets to choose. Then she says, NO! I choose blue! or whatever.
anyways yeah. and usually on weekdays I don't care. Let her wear her dress up dress to the store if she wants.
i agree. set stuff up in advance and ler her choose. I have gotten to the point with Parker that he has to do certain "jobs" before he comes upstairs and one of them is getting dressed with an outfit we have already picke and layed out. if he does without fighting he earns a star when he get a certain number of stars he gets whatever we have bee working towards. if he doesn't get dressed he has to stay downstairs until he does. May sounds mean, but it works.
There are times where I feel like I have to pick my battles and I let him wear football uniforms or cowboy chaps and hats out in public!
Since I know the genesis of this dilemma, once isn't going to undo everything...
Cosette has worn her fair share of interesting outfits. We have had talks though about what's appropriate for church. I don't think that will undermine any independence, but sets up expectations...
I wouldn't worry too much about it. My boys like to pick out their clothes, too, but we've set up days when they get to pick and days when I get to pick. If they hate what I pick out them sometimes I will give them 2 choices or tell them they can change into whatever they want as soon as we get home from church. I don't know if that helps with girl temperments....good luck!
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